Self Portrait @ 65

My last conversation with my mom was on books she has been hooked on reading these days. And all the different activities she has been involved with, throwing theme parties at our house, such as Bollywood night, monsoon beach, watching good old classic Hollywood movies at her friend's home theatre, writing poems, helping dad with his business and others. Her life seemed perfect to me.

Then my mommy asked me what I am up to these days (apart from work), Have I been reading, playing guitar, swimming? I knew I have become a lazy bump who goes to work, comes back, runs couple of miles, goes out with college friend, gets drunk (whenever possible) and sleeps like a log.

But I told her I am painting. I lied conveniently to her. Though she did not say anything, I think she guessed the truth.

Anyway, I wake up the next day morning. Scratching my back and looking at my ageing face in the bathroom mirror, I decided why not let my creativity loose and imagine how will I be (or rather will like to be) at 65 years. Hence I picked my brushes and decided to paint( all my oil painting material has been happily picking dust in my old cupboard).

Write up on painting: I was always amazed with classifications since I was a little kid, bold weak, beautiful ugly, intelligent stupid and many others. And what always baffled me is how do you define the boundary between the terms. Also I always wondered, how and why will god create some life form less grand than the other form. So I always said ugly is beautiful!! Stupid is intelligent....

Now at my 25 yrs, I am more confused than what I was at 10 yrs old. But at my 65 years, I want to gain knowledge of our existence. I want to know if there something more supreme than chasing big car, beautiful girls, having sea facing mansion (which I believe in now).

I tried my best to paint a calm and wiser face. I have given a golden and red shade to his beard and a tanned face(apart from the fact that I love tanning and long beard) for his acquired knowledge. I wanted to do abstract art when it came to little details such as eyes, ears etc. The black aura is ignorance that surrounds a person in his lifetime.

Love 101

For people who know me: yes, i know!! what you guys been thinking. What will this boy know about love!! Hahahaha..:)). Well it goes, I do. Ahem!!

And for those who are stumbling to this blog without having the privilege of meeting me in person and sharing my in-depth thoughts: Kids, You have come to the right person. I shall be your guru. i shall guide you to the eternal truth. I will decipher the whole meaning and game of this concept called ‘lowve’. By the end of this article you will get all the answers to the questions that have been baffling you in your stupid boring lifetime. Oops!! Enough said.

Anyway I will start my theory by broadly categorizing people. (I always felt it as the best way to look at this world).

1) The Facebooks addicts: those who insanely claim about their intense love story with their foolish status messages and innumerable stupid pictures of both holding hands in hands in all the 257 different possible poses and stating the whole world how much they have fallen in love.

Gosh it makes me vomit when I see these psychos. You love the other person more because you guys are craving for social acceptance from the outside world of you two being together. You guys thrive on all the ‘awww’, ‘oooo’ ‘wwwaahhh’ of reader’s comments. (and the other innumerable sounds that humans are capable of making since the starting of mankind). Wake up kids it’s the camera you love. For you love is the world telling you how cute and lovely you guys look together. You guys are pathetic of the lot because you will stick together more for the world around you than yourself as you guys are just incapable of feeling love and making decisions. I pity you the most.

But hey you are doing a huge favor on all us. Whenever I feel utterly bored I know what I need to check. Not to forget how many times I have dropped laughing hard on the floor. This includes my medical bill of whooping 1250 bucks. Damn you all!!

2) The social status symbol: God, these are another lot that I despise the most. I can’t tell you how many people I have met who just want a boyfriend/ girlfriend to prove to the world that they exist. It’s like buying a BMW or a flat in Suburbs of Mumbai. Motto: The world has it, so I need to have it. All those who are mentally retarded exist in this lot. Love can never be fulfillment for you guys as you fail to realize that. Its too superficial to start with. Their judgment is based on facts and figures like bank balance, car, etc. Feeling and compatibility are concepts alien to these people.

Its not love that brings the two together but it’s the need to prove the world that has done the wonders. There is absolutely no chemistry and even after gulping 11 pints of beers you will still wonder what brought the two together in the first place.

3) The Insecure: Those who want to be accepted that they are physically demanding. I feel it’s the need of the hour. With all these media attention, the human crave for looking beautiful will keep on increasing. And what can be a better way to feel it than getting attention from a beautiful girl or a handsome guy sitting across the table.

As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone I feel this is the best of the lots.

Well it’s hard to draw lines and group people in these categories. There’s always a percentage of the three categories that we can find in everyone.Anyway the one I will discuss now is the purest of all.

4) The made for each other: You feel love when you see the couple. You don’t have to be taught about it. It’s something you know. It’s something we always see in our parents. As you grow up and yet don’t really know what this word means. Looking at them you believe that concepts like serendipity and love at first sight does exist.

This made for each other (thanks to old Wills advertisement) statement is overused. It’s hard to find this lot. It’s a rarity but a gift.

Go on find your love. Believe me this world needs more love to make it a better place. Love is more than infatuation. But I totally believe love has to start with it. I mean how I can love a girl if I am not physically attracted to her.

Statutory warning: Love hurts!! and however tough you may pretend when someone breaks your heart, it does pain and its real. You make fake it with a smile and 'I'm fine' statement but you know its not cool. So find the right person before you decide to love someone. Really!! Wait how you can even decide whom to love. Forget it. Go on live the world. There is soo much confusion in this world and its complex social relationships, culture and human society. I think we will never be able to decipher our thoughts and feelings. If there is one beautiful creation god has created, it is our head and how we develop feelings with our different experiences. I think the beauty lies in living and experimenting life. But listen to your head and leave before it’s too late and you start losing yourself. World is too beautiful to fall for a person anyway!! :P

PS: I am not a love guru and for all who know me well, I am still the same old guy when it comes to girls:P And will most probably end up asking my mom’s help to look for a girl to marry me when I am 29. hahaha:) But hey I am still happy go lucky chap!!

On a serious note. This article sole purpose was to generate enthusiasm amongst blog's dying readerships (anything about love sells amongst confused teenage kids and adults in late 20s who still fail to understand its time they grow up. People in the middle of the two age groups are just too confused with this world to understand anything about life). So go comment, all you nitwits!! I thrive on your comments. Suits my narcissism!!

Though I strongly vouch against these cheap tricks to get readership. But hey the world is changing. Look at all the TV channels and newspaper. I m just adjusting to recent marketing needs. And this ill written article on the Holi eve (which I won’t be able to celebrate as I am on an offshore rig) is a step towards it. Tata!

The Blue Bunny with Pink Carrot!!

A play.

It's SLB life through Rock 'n' Roll music.

Featured songs

1) 'Echoes' by Pink Floyd

2) 'All screwed up' and 'Thunderstruck' by ACDC

4) 'Sally can wait' by Oasis.

5) 'Rockstar' by Nickleback

6) 'Take it easy' by Eagles

7) 'Take a look around' by Linking park

8) 'Alive' by POD

9) 'This is a new shit' by Marlyn Manson.

10) 'Love me 2 times' by Doors

11) 'With or Without you' by U2

Will post soon when story is complete.

The Elephant God

Recently I did this painting on mumma's kitchen wall.

Now that I have done one painting on 7 sins(below). My next one will be something on 5 virtues.

Lets see if I can think of something and manage within another 4 days of my vacation.

Any suggestions? will be helpful!!

The Solomon’s Seal

I just did an oil painting (it’s still wet and will take another 2 weeks to dry). My inspiration was MTV roadies show theme, 7 deadly sins; it’s the circle with its 7colours, each sin with different role and contribution towards keeping u away from truth. The journey of life is the path and the ultimate truth is the golden oval representing knowledge/peace/ final destination.

The blue represent emotions and I used this coloring style/ shading to depict the varied emotions like perplexities/ confusion/ depression/ anxiety/ happiness in ones life.

Its name was christened by mumma and she has agreed to give me space in her dining room (its will be on her wall so she is the one to name it). Her understanding is different and way better (but a little too philosophical for me).

Let’s see how many days I can manage to stay on her wall!! Jiji, game on 3-4 :P J, will share more pictures when it's framed.

Break Free!!

The best answer, I found to situations alien to me, is to run away. To float and not to be tied down. Like I ran away when I was a kid and didn’t want to participate in school play, ran away from college in my first year because I didn’t want to study, ran away from the girl I really loved because everything was so perfect (but, frankly, I don’t really know why), wanted to run away from my first job (when I was sent to Saudi) because I wanted to do business, later when my dad asked me to join him, I ran away too. I have attained perfection in the act and I think its time to do the same.

I want to listen music I enjoy, I want to play guitar, I want to paint, I want to read the books I loved, I want to write something beautiful, I want to say goodbye and I want to stay alone for a while. I want to breath, I want to again swim 10kms, I want to go para-gliding, I want to again experience life by jumping from a plane at 14,000fts, I want to be lost in a jungle, I want to drill oil and have those endless sleepless nights, I want to again go for mountain biking, discover untouched lands, I want to be lost in Australian desert, go on wild safari, I want to again do bungee jumping but this time from the bridge on river Nile, I want to climb Sphinx, I want to run and again complete a triathlon, I want to own a Maclaren, I want to study further and learn something new, I want to back pack and discover Russia and Antarctica.

I want to follow my heart. I want to let all my troubles go. I want to live the dream. I don’t want to lose my youth in this logical yet illogical world and its unnecessary worries. I keep learning it ain't worth and yet keep forgetting it.

Now I want to set myself free.

The Corporate Slavery

You join a company and after certain period, your life moulds according to it. And it’s when it’s institutionalized. You leave your innate characteristics and become part of the bigger system. You struggle to get in the shoes of the company, and follow the rules decided by few. You lose what you are apt in doing. Your life is bargained for their beliefs and your life is judged based on levels you can adjust to their system. (For the clarity of my readers I will like to add that company can be any group or a clan which supports same set of thoughts, can be one’s place of work, study or can be group of people you usually hang around with)

Possibly that’s the reason we find so much frustration and unhappiness in what people are doing. One is supposed to do what he wants and what he is good at rather than what the society forces upon him. One has to chase his dreams instead of others.

Everyone is born with certain distinctiveness and has the right to be what he wants to be, instead of being part of the system defined by few. Slavery isn’t dead; you have just stopped recognizing it. And the only one stopping you is ‘you’.